This past two weeks got a little crazy - husband ended up in the hospital with pneumonia and is still in recovery mode. I'm now catching up with shopping, cleaning, wrapping, and meal-planning for the upcoming Christmas weekend. I am grateful for my wonderful family, amazing friends, and the opportunity provided by today's technology to connect with people like you.
Thank you all for your interest and ongoing support when it comes to treating children who stutter. We must find a better way focused on keeping them talking instead of "managing" their speech! The journey continues... watch for a new posting next week!
Best,
Doreen/Dori Lenz Holte
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Join in the "spirited debate" over stuttering therapy for children.
Over the next several weeks I will be posting a series of commentaries on the opinions conveyed in a publication excerpt authored by a leader in the field of speech therapy for children who stutter. She forwarded the excerpt to me in reaction to my book, Voice Unearthed: Hope, Help, and a Wake-Up Call for the Parents of Children Who Stutter. The focus is on elements she believes influence therapy outcomes for children. I will not reveal the author’s identity, as my intent is to challenge the ideas, not the person.
The excerpt begins with the question “what elements, aside from those specific to a particular treatment approach, might influence a child’s responsiveness to stuttering therapy.” Taking the “treatment approach” out of the mix is like exploring a child’s response to shoes that are too small without considering the option of taking off the shoes. It could very well be that the child is sometimes uncooperative or ill-behaved, but let’s start with taking off the shoes!
Terms including “successful therapy” and “positive outcomes” are used throughout the excerpt but never defined. This is an issue I raise in my book – even the experts cannot agree on how to define “success.” Although most often defined as fewer speech errors, the easiest way for a child to make fewer speech errors is to not talk. Is this a “successful” outcome?
The article relates the reluctant behavior of children participating in therapy to problems with “temperament, personality, lack of control, and negative self-perception.” A parent who chooses to remove a child from therapy because they feel the therapy is too difficult or not relevant is “incongruent,” “Incongruent” is defined as an imbalance between intellect and emotion.
Parents are called upon to shift their role from “all powerful fixer” to “ally and advocate.” In reality, too often the therapist becomes the “all powerful fixer” armed with their tool box of speech techniques. Apparently a good parent “ally and advocate” should continue therapy even if they believe that the therapy is too difficult or not relevant to their child’s life. This begs the question -- whose "ally and advocate" has the parent really become?
The publication laments the lack of research that focuses on anything beyond pre- and post-treatment comparisons of measure of speech fluency – a point in which I heartily agree – and I feel that parents have the right to understand. Why does the field of stuttering therapy so enthusiastically promote therapies on the basis of research they openly acknowledge is lacking, yet disregard the parent’s perspective as emotionally and intellectually imbalanced?
Reference is made to the “spirited debate” that continues in this field – another point I feel it is important for parents to understand. Parents can best support their children by familiarizing themselves with all sides of the debate and becoming part of the debate. Voice Unearthed: Hope, Help, and a Wake-Up Call is the first book written about this subject from the parent’s perspective and is available at www.voiceunearthed.com. Ask your local library to carry the book on their shelves so all parents can better understand this debate and the concerns behind today’s therapy for children who stutter.
Thank you for your ongoing interest. Let's keep them talking!
Best,
Doreen Lenz Holte
The excerpt begins with the question “what elements, aside from those specific to a particular treatment approach, might influence a child’s responsiveness to stuttering therapy.” Taking the “treatment approach” out of the mix is like exploring a child’s response to shoes that are too small without considering the option of taking off the shoes. It could very well be that the child is sometimes uncooperative or ill-behaved, but let’s start with taking off the shoes!
Terms including “successful therapy” and “positive outcomes” are used throughout the excerpt but never defined. This is an issue I raise in my book – even the experts cannot agree on how to define “success.” Although most often defined as fewer speech errors, the easiest way for a child to make fewer speech errors is to not talk. Is this a “successful” outcome?
The article relates the reluctant behavior of children participating in therapy to problems with “temperament, personality, lack of control, and negative self-perception.” A parent who chooses to remove a child from therapy because they feel the therapy is too difficult or not relevant is “incongruent,” “Incongruent” is defined as an imbalance between intellect and emotion.
Parents are called upon to shift their role from “all powerful fixer” to “ally and advocate.” In reality, too often the therapist becomes the “all powerful fixer” armed with their tool box of speech techniques. Apparently a good parent “ally and advocate” should continue therapy even if they believe that the therapy is too difficult or not relevant to their child’s life. This begs the question -- whose "ally and advocate" has the parent really become?
The publication laments the lack of research that focuses on anything beyond pre- and post-treatment comparisons of measure of speech fluency – a point in which I heartily agree – and I feel that parents have the right to understand. Why does the field of stuttering therapy so enthusiastically promote therapies on the basis of research they openly acknowledge is lacking, yet disregard the parent’s perspective as emotionally and intellectually imbalanced?
Reference is made to the “spirited debate” that continues in this field – another point I feel it is important for parents to understand. Parents can best support their children by familiarizing themselves with all sides of the debate and becoming part of the debate. Voice Unearthed: Hope, Help, and a Wake-Up Call is the first book written about this subject from the parent’s perspective and is available at www.voiceunearthed.com. Ask your local library to carry the book on their shelves so all parents can better understand this debate and the concerns behind today’s therapy for children who stutter.
Thank you for your ongoing interest. Let's keep them talking!
Best,
Doreen Lenz Holte
Monday, August 22, 2011
What I mean by "real options."
In my recent book, "Voice Unearthed: Hope, Help, and a Wake-Up Call for the Parents of Children Who Stutter," I challenge support organizations to provide "real" options to the parents of school-aged children who are stuttering. I have been asked to clarify what I mean by "real options."
Sunday, July 31, 2011
They do not need fixing….really??
One statement I hear repeatedly is that “our children are NOT broken and do NOT need fixing!” While I do believe that acceptance (both on the listeners’ and the child’s part) is key to keeping the stuttering behavior from escalating, there is something about this statement that is unsettling. It sets up a false dichotomy – either they are broken or they are not broken - either they need fixing or they do not need fixing. In reality, I think the truth lies somewhere in between.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Just back from D.C. and the "Friends: Association of Young People Who Stutter" Convention. We are exhausted and happy to have met so many wonderful people. It was especially fun to put faces with the names of some of you who follow my blog!
I enjoyed watching Dr. Phil and Uri Schnieder’s "Going with the Flow" documentary (for the second time). If you haven’t seen it – go to http://www.schneiderspeech.com/ – well worth the trip! Dr. Schnieder also gave a parent workshop on listening. I appreciated his message on the importance of letting our kids who stutter know we will make whatever time they need to listen to what they have to say. Reflecting back on our own journey, I had some thoughts on the same subject.
When Eli’s older twin brothers spoke up, most often I would continue folding the clothes or drying the pans or sweeping the floor. I would nod my head, give a yeah or nay when required, and quite possibly not even make eye contact throughout the entire exchange. When Eli spoke, I often dropped everything, knelt down to his eye-level, made good eye contact, and nodded my head dutifully as he spoke. You probably see where this is heading...
When Eli was older, he informed me that my intense listening sometimes made him uncomfortable and I suspect that my distracted listening habits paid short shrift to my older two boys. The trick was finding a happy medium. I had to become an equal opportunity listener. Not every exchange necessitated an intense level of attention for any of my kids --and I could do a far better job of listening, in general, for all of my kids! Just thought I would share that perspective.
Thanks again to all who put the FRIENDS convention together and to all who made it so welcoming. Hope your travels home were uneventful and I look forward to staying in touch!
Best,
Doreen (Dori) Lenz Holte
I enjoyed watching Dr. Phil and Uri Schnieder’s "Going with the Flow" documentary (for the second time). If you haven’t seen it – go to http://www.schneiderspeech.com/ – well worth the trip! Dr. Schnieder also gave a parent workshop on listening. I appreciated his message on the importance of letting our kids who stutter know we will make whatever time they need to listen to what they have to say. Reflecting back on our own journey, I had some thoughts on the same subject.
When Eli’s older twin brothers spoke up, most often I would continue folding the clothes or drying the pans or sweeping the floor. I would nod my head, give a yeah or nay when required, and quite possibly not even make eye contact throughout the entire exchange. When Eli spoke, I often dropped everything, knelt down to his eye-level, made good eye contact, and nodded my head dutifully as he spoke. You probably see where this is heading...
When Eli was older, he informed me that my intense listening sometimes made him uncomfortable and I suspect that my distracted listening habits paid short shrift to my older two boys. The trick was finding a happy medium. I had to become an equal opportunity listener. Not every exchange necessitated an intense level of attention for any of my kids --and I could do a far better job of listening, in general, for all of my kids! Just thought I would share that perspective.
Thanks again to all who put the FRIENDS convention together and to all who made it so welcoming. Hope your travels home were uneventful and I look forward to staying in touch!
Best,
Doreen (Dori) Lenz Holte
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
You Can Now Order Voice Unearthed: Hope, Help, and a Wake-Up Call for the Parents of Children Who Stutter
I am excited to announce that after six years in the works -- "Voice Unearthed: Hope, Help, and a Wake-Up Call for the Parents of Children Who Stutter" can now be ordered online.
Go to www.voiceunearthed.com to learn about this book project and to place your order. The book is being printed this week and shipping will begin around July 14th. I have kept the price as low ($14.95 plus shipping and handling) to keep it affordable for families and students.
Feel free to forward this opportunity on to friends, family, collegues - anyone you know who is or may become involved with a child who stutters. Thank you so much for your ongoing interest.
Hopefully Eli and I will meet some of you in a few weeks at the FRIENDS conference in D.C. For those of you traveling to the NSA conference this week in Fort Worth - enjoy and safe travels -- wish we could be there too.
Best,
Doreen (Dori) Lenz Holte
Go to www.voiceunearthed.com to learn about this book project and to place your order. The book is being printed this week and shipping will begin around July 14th. I have kept the price as low ($14.95 plus shipping and handling) to keep it affordable for families and students.
Feel free to forward this opportunity on to friends, family, collegues - anyone you know who is or may become involved with a child who stutters. Thank you so much for your ongoing interest.
Hopefully Eli and I will meet some of you in a few weeks at the FRIENDS conference in D.C. For those of you traveling to the NSA conference this week in Fort Worth - enjoy and safe travels -- wish we could be there too.
Best,
Doreen (Dori) Lenz Holte
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
To School or Not To School?
Final edits on my book "Voice Unearthed: Hope, Help, and a Wake-Up Call for the Parents of Children Who Stutter" are done and with the layout person. It should be available by the end of the month! So back to blogging. This blog topic has been inspired by a parent's question on the NSA Parents listserve...
To School or Not To School?
For the sake of transparency - I'll tell you up front that we have homeschooled all three of our boys and that decision had nothing to do with Eli's speech struggles. He was a wee babe when we started homeschooling his older brothers. They are now 19 and doing great. I am very grateful for having had that choice but I recognize that not every parent has that option, or would choose it even if they did. For those who include it in their list of possibilities - here is my perspective...
Dr. Jerry Halvorson states:
"Allow every stutterer to talk, talk, talk… no matter age, severity or situation. The more the better. The less inhibition the better. The more initiations the better. The more verbal reactions, the better, the more socialization the better, and infinitum. Release his speech. Allow him to speak as much as is physically, emotionally, and cognitively possible – and do so without forcing."
The more you can have your child in an environment that allows this level of freedom and inhibition, the greater likelihood that your child’s speech tension will melt away, or at least, not get worse. Unfortunately, this is pretty much in contrast to the classroom environment, where kids spend most of their childhood years. In the classroom:
- Acceptable talking is most often in response to questions designed to assess performance and comprehension, adding pressure and layers of anxiety around speaking.
- Children are expected to talk in front of large groups and the content of their speech is continually being assessed.
- Uninhibited, spontaneous talking is highly discouraged.
The best teachers in the world cannot get around these classroom management parameters – and our classrooms are only getting bigger.
Today there are many exciting alternatives available from home schooling to free online public schools to home school cooperatives. I would strongly recommend that parents with children experiencing any type of communication apprehension consider and research these options.
Does this mean your child will sit at home and never have to speak to anyone outside of the immediate family? Absolutely not. Options to the brick and mortar public schools are thriving and there are many families out there to connect with for social experiences and academic events. There are also community options (4H, Scouts, local theater, church, music, chess club, etc…) that can keep a family very busy and provide many safe and relaxed social experiences. These are wonderful choices for children who are stuttering because they will have more flexibility to pursue their interests, have less pressure and anxiety around speaking, and have far more freedom to talk, talk, talk.
My book talks more about how you can support your child in group settings, such as a classroom or club setting. I am happy to be a resource for anyone considering alternatives to the public school setting. Feel free to email me at voiceunearthed.gmail.com.
Best,
Doreen Lenz Holte
To School or Not To School?
For the sake of transparency - I'll tell you up front that we have homeschooled all three of our boys and that decision had nothing to do with Eli's speech struggles. He was a wee babe when we started homeschooling his older brothers. They are now 19 and doing great. I am very grateful for having had that choice but I recognize that not every parent has that option, or would choose it even if they did. For those who include it in their list of possibilities - here is my perspective...
Dr. Jerry Halvorson states:
"Allow every stutterer to talk, talk, talk… no matter age, severity or situation. The more the better. The less inhibition the better. The more initiations the better. The more verbal reactions, the better, the more socialization the better, and infinitum. Release his speech. Allow him to speak as much as is physically, emotionally, and cognitively possible – and do so without forcing."
The more you can have your child in an environment that allows this level of freedom and inhibition, the greater likelihood that your child’s speech tension will melt away, or at least, not get worse. Unfortunately, this is pretty much in contrast to the classroom environment, where kids spend most of their childhood years. In the classroom:
- Acceptable talking is most often in response to questions designed to assess performance and comprehension, adding pressure and layers of anxiety around speaking.
- Children are expected to talk in front of large groups and the content of their speech is continually being assessed.
- Uninhibited, spontaneous talking is highly discouraged.
The best teachers in the world cannot get around these classroom management parameters – and our classrooms are only getting bigger.
Today there are many exciting alternatives available from home schooling to free online public schools to home school cooperatives. I would strongly recommend that parents with children experiencing any type of communication apprehension consider and research these options.
Does this mean your child will sit at home and never have to speak to anyone outside of the immediate family? Absolutely not. Options to the brick and mortar public schools are thriving and there are many families out there to connect with for social experiences and academic events. There are also community options (4H, Scouts, local theater, church, music, chess club, etc…) that can keep a family very busy and provide many safe and relaxed social experiences. These are wonderful choices for children who are stuttering because they will have more flexibility to pursue their interests, have less pressure and anxiety around speaking, and have far more freedom to talk, talk, talk.
My book talks more about how you can support your child in group settings, such as a classroom or club setting. I am happy to be a resource for anyone considering alternatives to the public school setting. Feel free to email me at voiceunearthed.gmail.com.
Best,
Doreen Lenz Holte
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